Hello, Beauties! Today’s title is How to Feel: Determined and Gentle at the same time. In real time, humans seldom feel only one feeling at a time. But intellectually, I often find myself thinking thoughts like:
“If I’m determined, then it is impossible to be gentle with myself.”
Is it possible? Why would you want to feel them at the same time?
How do you feel
determined (and gentle) simultaneously?
Emotions like determination signify being strict with yourself. Performing perfectly. Skipping downtime. Setting unrealistic expectations. Judging yourself. No gentleness in sight.
Emotions like gentleness denote permissiveness. Letting yourself off the hook. Making excuses. Settling for good enough. Relaxing of standards. No determination in sight.
They are opposite ends of the spectrum and complement each other nicely. In truth, it never occurred to me I could CHOOSE to feel them simultaneously.
My thinking was completely black and white. Oops, there’s that perfectionism again. It shows up at the oddest times. Especially when working on a long term project, being gentle with yourself is a sign of strength, not weakness.
So, let’s use the tools for feeling feelings so you don’t need to eat them.
How does determination feel in your body?
Wonder Woman stance
Laser focus as if you had blinders on to block out distractions
How does gentleness feel in your body?
Pat on the back
Allowing – lack of resistance
Imagine coupling these two and pointed them at your weight loss journey. Determination allows you to build new habits and let go of old ones. Gentleness grants you permission to release self-judgment and shame.
Together, they create the infrastructure for the weeks or months or years your body needs to shed the pounds permanently. I don’t just want weight loss for you, I want permanent, sustainable, weight loss.
You have other brilliant work to do in the world once weight loss is accomplished.
I’d love to show you in real time what it looks like to let go of people pleasing. It is ONE of the BIG 3 – perfectionism, procrastination, and people pleasing – habits that block weight loss.
I am currently sharing my food journals, my weight loss process and the practiced thoughts that show up to sabotage me in my private FaceBook group. I’d love to have you join the bigger conversation that is happening there.
You are so ready for this work. Every time you’ve ever lost, gained, lost again, given up, lost focus, restarted has perfectly positioned you for this leg of the journey. I am so looking forward to meeting you.
Love you my Voluptuous Beauties!
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